Black Moon Ranch (Colorado, USA)

Cynder winced at the sound of Snape's voice.
She hoped she had not caused him pain...
he had done nothing to her, and yet she couldn't help but pour out her feelings in such a way.

When he asked her the questions, she spoke with a forced sob, like that of someone with difficulty getting over death.
Death.... would have.. hurt less then this...


"Everyone else has.... i know they have. I first trusted the Dark Lord with my life,... that he would keep me safe, but..."
She trembled, tightening her grip on her sides.
"My own parents even.... I just... I can't... my heart.... aches.... I can't stand this any more.."

She was shaking roughly.
But she swallowed strongly, loudly, trying to calm herself.

"... Please.... Sir.... go back to Hogwarts without me, then.... I'll... I'll be shortly behind you..."

"No, I am going with you."
Silence.

S I L E N C E

He was going to talk this out with her. He made her cry. It was his fault. He was going to stay with her. No matter how long it took.

Cynder was shaking still, her breathing shallow and pressed with the hiccups that plague heartfelt sobs.

Cries of loneliness seemed to emit quietly from her body, and she had to pull a chair over and collapse into it as to not sink to the floor.

".... w-why..?" she groaned slightly, "Why w-wait..? You can go... I- I... I U-u-unders-stand..."

Snape threw his face into his arms.
"How many times do I have to say this to you, Cynder? You are a waste for me. Later on in your path in life, you will find someone WORTH your qualities..."
He wondered whether she had heard him as his voice was muffled by his hands.

Cynder looked up.

Her cheeks were soaked with salty tears, but she did not seem to care.
Still attacked by the sobs and hiccups, the girl shook slightly as she looked at the man.

And her heart broke.
Not for the pain she was in, but for the man. She couldn't tell how much he hurt, but she felt it was her fault.

"S-Severus..."
she spoke softly, forcing a sob away from her, forcing herself to keep looking straight at him with her sorrowful eyes.
"Can you not see..? I weep for you.... because You're hurting..."

Her breathing was stiff, forced, hurt.
But she continued.

"What had happened to you in your life..? Can't you see, Snape..? Can't you see that I don't care if there's someone you say I deserve. Because I've gotten more then I could ever hope for, being with you..."

She sobbed slightly, tears streaming down her cheeks.
She swallowed, and forced herself on.

"You're a good man, Severus. I'm sorry. This is all my fault. But... You're right... t-there... there isn't a hope for us to be together, is there...? .... I understand..... But I'll never stop loving you.... I'll stay by myself if that's how it'll be. And God knows I've been alone so long, this will not make a difference.."

another pause, the girl seemed to search. She seemed to Plead with the man with her eyes.

"Please.... stop crying because of my stupidity. You... should get to Hogwarts... they'll be missing you.."

Snape's head shot out of his hand.
He no longer looked sad.
But full of anger.
Why couldn't Cynder just move on and find someone who is WORTHY of what she's worth?
He stood up abruptly.
"Cynder! Can't you see what's happening to you!? I just hurt you over and over again! Open up your heart and allow it to love others!" he said through gritted teeth.
"Me, hurting you, is hurting me deep inside. And why don't you understand?"

Cynder watched Snape quietly, wiping her cheeks with her sleeves, snuffling lightly.

But this time, she did not shrink away. She stood up, tall and brave, and spoke calmly.

"I have been hurt more then I care to count, Severus. Today will not make a difference. Crying and pain is life. I allow my heart to love in a different manner then the way I love you... because I'm afraid. And because I cannot love anyone else. I.... do not love anyone else."

A pause, she scowled.

"Don't hurt yourself. Or deny yourself. I won't give up."

Poor Matthew...

(( ik. :c -hugs Matt- ))